If Chivalry is Dead then I'm Embracing the Single Life
Because these are my last days off before my summer job begins on Monday, I was lounging around and reading old posts from my favorite blog Very Smart Brothas If you haven't checked them out then do it NOW you NEED THIS IN YOUR LIFE. Anywhoo this particular post was about the dreaded diva dude which I'm sure every woman of dating age no matter what race has had the misfortune of coming across. (Peep the Post) Though the entire post was HIGHlarious as usual. I was most interested in bullet point number five. "They are not chilvourous and proud of it". I'm sorry when did this come the norm. Perhaps because Nightline and fools like Steve Harvey continually tell Black women we need to adjust ourselves if we expect to get a ring on it, when clearly numbers wise we seem to be the ones with our lives together, ring or no ring. (And for that matter I know many young Black couples who are married) But that's another discussion for another day. Some dudes now a days act like you expecting them to take you out for a decent meal is like asking for a kidney, their life savings, mama's address and last name. Really dude? You asked me out I was simply expecting some crab cakes from red lobster and maybe a sprite. Let me set the record straight, I have a job I work very hard and can afford to take myself out whenever I wish but if I am invited out a date I expect a man to at least cover the meal. ( Don't get me wrong, I'm going to be polite and reach for my wallet I'm definatly not stuck up or snobby but I got all dressed up to go Dutch? SMH I dont think so. I could've ordered a pizza and watched Love Jones) Going DUTCH is NOT A DATE especially on the first outing (Yes I realize that this is a recession but dudes need to learn to be creative with their money, ever heard of asking a woman out for just dessert? Or maybe go out to dinner and rent a movie from Netflix instead of spending $12.50/person on the show) I bring this subject up because this dude I talked to years ago had been texting me talking about how he wanted to see me so bad etc (side eye). I'm like cool we can go to dinner. He then precedes to text 50/50? I'm like negative. He goes "you just a friend". (Barely) But, the fact of the matter is I'm still a woman and you the one tryna see me. After he called me cheap I promptly told him I was more than happy to take myself out whenever I wished he told me to go then and I told him that I would. (Yes I know a waste of my good unlimited txt msg plan). A week later after not hearing from me he txt me threatening to delete my number. Which he probably did, but whatever. Maybe I'm crazy but thats crazy ridiculous. Dudes barely get out the car and ring the damn bell or open doors anymore. I do realize that all men are not like this, the last dude I dated was really cool and very chivalrous and we're still cool now which I appreciate. Maybe its true and its hard out here for women these days but I'm def not gonna lower my standards cuz you a fool or some naive woman (yes I was naive once too, let you get away with your foolywag). As verysmartbrothas so wonderfully stated, part of being a grown man (and a grown woman) is doing the right thing without any expectation of acknowledgment or reward. DELAYED GRATIFICATION= MATURITY. Therefore I will not be going out with any of these fools and other single women I hope you don't either because like me I'm sure you can head over to the Cheesecake Factory with your girls and order your stuffed chicken enchiladas with a sprite any time you wish.